The Crspr supercomputer interface is simple to use. First, enter a possible organism to genetically modify, here we will enter ant. After we mapped the human genome the scientific community began mapping every animal genome and logging them in what we call the arc. So the next thing we enter into the interface is arc. Finally, we enter the organism which has the blight that needs to be eradicated, so in this case we enter tick, since it carries Lyme's disease. So we have AntArcTick in our Crspr supercomputer and we click enter and let the arc run. Very nice, it looks as though we can design ants that attack and eat ticks. Now, as always, we have to write an explaination as to how this will advance medicine since modern medicine is the biggest sponsor. It's still running the program and it looks like it is generating ants that will enter the human body and eat cancer cells then die.
The animals are building me a submarine crew. They live in the garden I am allowed to walk in and the surrounding forest. They already convinced Noah once to build an arc and don't want to repeat history so are preparing to man a nuclear powered submarine. The captain is a groundhog whose ancestors have butted heads with every underground cement wall in every missile silo nationwide. Her name is Peri because she pulled the bottom of a downspout apart that looks like a periscope. I even caught her one morning playing with the piece of corrugated pipe protruding from the ground with one downspout 90 degree elbow attached and staring out at the garden.
There are three rabbits that live in the garden a male, Jumpin Jack Flash. The counterpart to this sonar man is Jumpin Jill Flash and there is a young-ling named Jobi. There are four deer ready to run the radar posts. There is Doe the mom, Button a second year deer, and Bambi and Bamboozle both in spots. The flock of turkey has a 3 adult team to man their shift at radio post. Gobbler, with a ten inch beard, Jake with a stub for a beard, and Hen who works third post. They are raising a flock of 8 young-lings that will fit into the crew nicely. As head of the galley we have a fox squirrel always sourcing seeds from the bird feeders named Skyfox. The torpedo crew is a group of small birds with yellow heads and black wings, 5 in total. Finally, for the Seal commander is an all-black cat that hones his land skills in the garden by scatting where I began a new walking trail.
We have to man a submarine because there are too many physicists and scientists flying around looking pretty. They should know better, all wars must be produced with an over-water passage of at least 90 percent of their committed forces. Every time a physicist flies somewhere on vacation the wifi on the plane enters another dimension and his youth is preserved through time travel. All modern war has thrown World War II beach assault protocol out of the window and they simply copy and paste the Berlin Airlift to obtain their budget to kill. That's why the United States dropped two bombs on Japan and then Chernobyl happened and also the 3 Mile Island nuclear meltdown. If you're keeping score we're all tied up and top brass should know better than allowing us to fly outside of the United States during a war.
Most of the smart Southern states got out of pharmaceutical testing with a federal study that proves that monkeys can run a semi-automated FM radio station. It got them out of the "clinical trials" and animal studies and got monkeys a 6 hour shift. One station, four 6 hour shifts, great music 24 hours. If you think about it all of the animal tests for cosmetics should have wrapped up in the 1990's. That is why Paris Hilton and Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen started their cosmetic companies. They wanted to hide all of the animal studies on large hard drives in Japan until women realize that they're just swapping recipes to patent a powder. By they're I mean American businessmen. There is always some rich man that will do more testing so that his wife can start an Avon-like pyramid business to keep the idea of entrepreneurialism alive in the suburbs.
Why a submarine you may wonder. With a submarine we can use special technology to map under the ice and log it on our hard drive. Subarctic-toc goes the clock, but this time we will block the call. They should have invaded from the water and overland. I wonder if Marines use the buddy system when they are boarded on naval craft. The most state-of-the-art sick deck on the newest aircraft carrier takes one buddy and does a whole body scan. It's a Marine so we need the data in case he is blown up and needs surgery, send it to the satellite system. The body scan copy will bounce off of our colonies in Antarctica if they are important enough. If not we can use it for our studies back home, see if it will save at a domestic hospital.
We need room for our medical studies and domestic hospitals have become the storage centers for a plethora of data. Did you get your colon scoped, yeah, did you? I did mine looked like one of those underwater ice maps I saw in the Navy. Mr. Hospital Director we have more Marine scans coming in should we dump the data from your colonoscopy or shorten the time we save data from security cameras? You can dump mine but don't dump anyone's that is worth more than a million dollars, they are high dollar assets and Marines are a dime a dozen. Bounce them back through Antarctica, it's free on my data plan.